Dragoon Vacation
by Kee2
Summary: Ever wondered what would a vacation with the Dragoons be like? This is the story of what I'd be like. PLEASE REVIEW
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I don't own Legend of Dragoon or anything else besides me and this little sock I have hee hee  
  
I have nothing to say but review please. Uhhh…no that's it  
  
  
  
  
  
Dragoon Vacation  
  
  
  
The Dragoons are at home bored. Everyone is watching TV…but the only thing on is Dragon Tales  
  
Rose: Someone please kill each other its too much goodness  
  
Shana: I like it  
  
Kee: Shana you like anything that doesn't have bloodshed  
  
Shana: That's not true I like…uhh…you know…uhh…your right I don't like bloodshed  
  
Meru: I HAVE AN IDEA…wait no I just forgot it  
  
Dart: VACATION LETS GO ON VACATION  
  
Kee: IM HUNGRY  
  
Kongol: Eat later  
  
Albert: How about the beach?  
  
Dart: Camping is good  
  
Meru: I want to go to a mountain  
  
Rose: Lets go to all these places  
  
Albert: We only have $5  
  
Haschel: TO THE RETIRMENT HOME!!!  
  
Kee grabs a Barney mask and scares Haschel to death  
  
Kee: One less person to pay for  
  
Dart: Good…wait no GRANPA!!!! WHY OH WHY!!??  
  
Haschel: You suck as a grandson  
  
Dart: I HATE YOU!!!!!  
  
Kee starts getting ready by packing clothes, gameboy, TV, cell phone, his cats, a friend, an elephant, a shark, and a pillow all in one bookbag  
  
Dart: Can Lloyd come?  
  
Kee: No  
  
Dart: Why?  
  
Kee: Because I will kill him for killing Lavitz  
  
Kee looks at the window and sees Lloyd whimpering. Kee throws the elephant at the window and crushes him even though he's still alive  
  
Kee: I knew I'd needed that  
  
Meru: Do you need all that?  
  
Kee: No I just needed it to be funny  
  
Meru: Oh…uhh…wanna stick a goldfish in a microwave?  
  
Shana: NO NOT GOLDIE!!!!!!!  
  
Kee: Nah  
  
Shana: Good  
  
Kee: Lets boil the water with it in it  
  
Shana: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!  
  
6 hours later  
  
  
  
Everyone is in the car bored while Meru is looking for her crayons to color  
  
Meru: WHO HAS IT?!! I WANNA COLOR  
  
Meru notices Kee is eating something. She looks closer to see that Kee is eating the crayons  
  
Meru: KKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Kee: ::munching:: Crayons taste like purple  
  
Meru: NNNNOOOOOOO!!!! MY CRAYONS!!!!!!!  
  
Kee: Relax you'll get them back…just not for awhile  
  
All: Ewwwwwwwwwww  
  
Shana: WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAHHHH!!! GOLDIE IS DEAD WWWWWAAAAHHH!!! ::Eating Goldie:: ::sniff:: needs butter…WWWWWWWAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!  
  
Rose: Are we there yet?  
  
Dart: No  
  
Rose: How about now?  
  
Dart: Yeah we are  
  
Rose: !  
  
Albert: Next stop the beach!  
  
Will They go to the beach? Will Kee ever be a Gundom pilot? Will Rose ever stop PMSing? All these will be answered right now  
  
Yes  
  
Temporarily until he was fired  
  
No  
  
Want to see what happens? Gotta wait till the next chapter which will be soon. I love being cruel. PLEASE REVIEW. The more reviews the more funnier the next chapter will be. 


	2. The Beach

Disclaimer: I don't own legend of dragoon or the beach.wait do I?.No no I don't  
  
OK im getting complaints that my stories are too short. Its not my fault. I think I write a lot and it turns out I only typed like a pages worth. Ok I know that it took me friggin forever but I had to edit new parts. If this wasn't my best work please go easy on me I had no inspiration. Enjoy and review  
  
  
  
  
  
Ch.2 The Beach  
  
Everyone gets out of the car except for Kee who is still munching on a pink crayon. They all are unpacking  
  
Dart: WHOO HOO THE BEACH. Who has the sunscreen?  
  
Shana: I thought you had it  
  
Dart: No I told Kee to get it  
  
Kee: ::looking at them screaming:: I THOUGHT DART HAD IT!!!!!  
  
Dart: Great...Simply great  
  
Miranda: Screw this im getting in the water  
  
Miranda Jumps it the water and begins to swim. She later gets stuck in the seaweed and supposedly drowns.  
  
All: YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!  
  
Miranda: ::getting up:: IM NOT DEAD  
  
All: BOOO!!!!!  
  
Kee: Yes you are.  
  
Kee gets a bag of "Sea Monkeys" and pours it in the water. Before you know it Miranda is being attack by monkeys (Yes monkeys with spears and fish bowls on their heads)  
  
Kee: Geez I thought they were suppose to be shrimp  
  
Meru: Is it safe to get in the water?  
  
Kee: I dunno check  
  
Kee kicks Meru into the water where she screams and kicks because she cant swim  
  
Kee: Meru just move your only on the tip of the water  
  
Meru: I knew that.I was just testing you that's all  
  
Suddenly the sea monkeys pop outta the water  
  
King Monkey: Listen to our demands and we wont hurt no one else. 1. I want a pony 2. I want a Karbie dream house 3. I want another pony 4.  
  
The monkey suddenly gets pelted with ice cream  
  
Rose: I hate monkeys  
  
Kee: Rose ::points to the sun::  
  
Rose remembers and soon starts to smoke up  
  
Rose: AHHHHHHHH NO NO NO AHHHHHH IM MELTING!!!!!!  
  
Rose scampers like an ant into a safe spot.Unfortunately she's bald now  
  
Rose: ::paranoid:: its all in my head.its all in my dead  
  
Meru: Must suck to be a vampire  
  
Kee: Yup  
  
Later we join Dart & Shana with metal Detectors trying to find gold and dolls and stuff  
  
Dart: This is boring  
  
Shana: ::slaps Dart on the head:: Keep checkin!!  
  
Dart: Yes master  
  
Suddenly the machine beeps. Shana comes with a shovel machine thingy and scoops up Gyt, Alc, and all the others  
  
Dart: Hi  
  
The Group: Hi  
  
Shana: I thought this was suppose to detect metal  
  
Dart: Oh yeah.HEY! There's a treasure chest  
  
Alc: THAT'S MINE  
  
Gyt: It is?  
  
Dart and Shana get the treasure chest and bury the rest again  
  
Kee: Shouldn't we keep them up here?  
  
Shana: No  
  
Kee: Ok  
  
They open the treasure chest. Its full of cheese  
  
Dart: That's it??.  
  
Shana: I wasted $5,000,000 for cheese?  
  
Kee: I thought we only had $5  
  
Dart: We do but its your fic cant you make up money?  
  
Kee: Oh so you rely on me for everything?  
  
Shana: Yeah why do you think you're here  
  
Kee: GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!  
  
Kee sends Dart & Shana to Chuck E. Cheese (remember that? I never get tired of it) to forever be surrounded by Umpa Lumpas  
  
Kee: Mmmmmmmm.Forbidden cheeeese  
  
Kee eats all the cheese in one bite  
  
Kee: I'll go see what Kongol and Albert are doing  
  
Kee walks off like an idiot to see that they're doing. They're at the snack bar. Kongol is begging for free burgers while Albert is reading "How to be smart without being a smartass".  
  
Albert: Im on chapter 1562781474568565514 im only 1 day  
  
Kongol: ::On his knees with tears:: PLEASE PLEASE ONE FOR KONGOL!!!!  
  
Clerk: No burger for you..  
  
Kongol: Kongol SMASH!!!!! ::gets his axe when he is suddenly tasered::  
  
Kee: ::Holding the taser:: I love this toy  
  
Albert: A taser is an electric weapon that AHHHHH!!!!! ::ZAP!!!!!::  
  
Kee: Like I said I love this toy  
  
Kee shows the taser the clerk  
  
Kee: Burger for me?  
  
The Clerk gives Kee 3 burgers as he eats them in front of Kongol  
  
Kongol: Kongol is gonna get Jenny Jones on you!!!!!  
  
Albert: Yeah I can see the title "Mean psychos with tasers"  
  
Kee: Ok where's Miranda and Haschel?  
  
Albert: In the bathroom  
  
Kee: Ok  
  
Kee walks off idiotically and goes in the bathroom. Later he runs out slamming the door and having an asthma attack.  
  
Meru: What's wrong?  
  
Kee: The horror the horror  
  
Meru walks in to see Haschel and Miranda playing patty cake  
  
Meru: That is disturbing.  
  
Later we see everyone getting ready to go.They're all burnt, Rose is still scared, and Dart and Shana just came outta a portal screaming  
  
Kee: Finally! Lets go  
  
They all get in the car and leave  
  
Dart: I got an empty treasure chest  
  
Shana: I used the tickets and got a Karbie ::plays with it.Suddenly the head comes off:: Damn cheap toys  
  
Kongol: Kongol got burger  
  
Albert: I got a burger  
  
Miranda: I got sand in my boot  
  
Haschel: I met some retired people my age  
  
Rose: I got a new phobia  
  
Meru: I GOT NEW CRAYONS..Where are they? Kee?  
  
Kee is munching on something again  
  
Meru: YOU ATE MY CRAYONS  
  
Kee: ::Swallowing a blue crayon:: Did not!  
  
Meru: GRRRRR ::Starts attacking Kee::  
  
Dart: Not again!  
  
  
  
The End  
  
Read, review, and go eat some crayons. Get ready for my next fic? I'll give you a clue MY PARENTS ARE VISITING!!!! That one will be out very, very soon. 


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